stachitus allys/ponch/jamal/harold/

spends countless hours hidden in the cave of her room blogging, doing homework, sleeping and sacrificing virgins. Not really. that last one was a joke.

spends countless hours hidden in the cave of her room blogging, doing homework, sleeping, and sacrificing virgins. Not really. that last one was a joke.

A Plethora of What? Damsel in Distress Domino Lizbob Moon's Notes and Nonsense rockabye Zombiee

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I have written letters to you. But I can't use your first name, because you might find this blog and read it(because, you know, you're totally the kind of person who looks up blogs called stachitus). So I've decided to use your middle name. Yes, I know your middle name. James. It's beautiful. I have decided to put them on here. And they might sound a little desperate, broken hearted, maybe a bit obsessed and definitely infatuated. So be warned. I write them before I go to bed!

Okay, I wrote this today.

Dear ______ James:

Hello Love! Today I felt really sad, because of you. It wasn't really your fault. I started thinking that I didn't have a chance with you. And I'm really nothing without you. Well, you didn't really know that you were making me feel sad, but you smiled big anyways, and waved. (Thanks.) I was sitting in my car and I was intently focused on being sad. Your car was right next to mine, so I knew that we would inevitably cross paths. I wasn't quite sure if I wanted to see you. I kept saying oh crap oh crap oh crap. While you were walking to your car. I tried not looking at you, but you were so gorgeous I had to. It seemed light light was emanting from you. So I just stared at you with a grim look on my face. (Maybe a slight smile.) You smiled and waved and I tried to look happy. I don't think it worked too well. I didn't wave back, because I was too busy wringing my hands. Then you got in your car. I watched you. i think you knew that. I didn't care. I was intent in seeing you. It hurt. Being within a foot of you, only seperated by about half an inch of glass, and I couldn't touch you. Now that I'm thinking of it, it hurts everyday. Seeing you, wanting you, and wanting to touch you, wanting to hold you and kiss you, and I just can't! I rested my head against the glass and looked at you for a while. Step father sat in the car. I looked at you and you smiled big again and waved. I felt sick to the stomach as I waved back to you and had to watch you back up and drive away.




I wrote this last night. It has song lyrics. I know. Embarrassing. What can I say? It was a saturday!

Dear ______ James:

I never knew that I could feel like this.
Like I've never seen the sky before.
I want to find you inside your kiss.
Everyday I love you more and more.

Today I missed you. I cried. It was hard. It's hard seeing you too. I can get so close. Close enough to feel you. Hold you. But I can't even touch you. I have hope, but I still cry. every memory, all I have of you is happy. Every smile of yours makes me happy...and sad. The sound of your voice kills me inside. You have no idea what you are doing. I know you know. You know how I feel. But I'm still standing here without you. I shouldn't feel like this. I am nothing without you. Suddenly my life doesn't feel such a waste. This could either break my heart or save me. Maybe I am crazy. I shouldn't write letters to someone who will never read them! Maybe it just makes me feel better. Or maybe worse. I still love you.



This one was from november 14:

Dear ______ James:

I just want to let you know that you make me happy. my breath stops when I see you. My heart flies. I see every color brighter and I glow. from inside out. A bright euphoria shines from my heart making my smile bigger. Your smile shines and I wish it was for me.

Can I hold you some day? ★ I want to kiss you, but then I'll miss you. ★ here! Have a blog post! ★ as weeks went by it showed that she was not fine ★ Smiles Are Overrated. ★ One More day ★ Silly, stupid girl. ★ Wilting Roses ★ August 2008 ★ November 2008 ★ December 2008 ★ January 2009 ★ February 2009 ★ March 2009 ★ April 2009 ★ June 2009 ★ August 2009 ★ March 2010 ★ April 2010 ★ November 2010 ★ Coded by wickedicy banner from Reviviscent.